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“It’s all about the Okanagan Wine Art. You’re famous for it. You’re so famous, even I have heard of you.”

So says my new Blog Boss, who heard of me when I called her for help. She goes on to say, “get busy! Blog about your art, talk about the Okanagan, say something about wine.”

redneck with sleeves torn off and beer bottle glares into into a glass of wine.
The Quinessential Redneck

I resisted for years because ‘Blog’ isn’t an actual word so much as a guttural muttering, similar to the sound a redneck makes by cupping a hand under his armpit and pumping the arm up and down. That’s why so many rednecks tear their sleeves off – so they can get at their armpits. Blog. It turns out this pathetic sound actually denotes a Commentary. In my case, it’s to be an Okanagan Wine Art commentary.

The conversation with my wife went like this: “Dolly, I need food.”

“So go sell some art while I boil you some potatoes.”

I whined, “I’m trying, but the buyers are all texting and facebooking and wine touring and being everywhere except in our Art Gallery! Some of them are even bl***ing.”

“You need to seize their attention – so hire an attention-seizing expert!”

The Attention Seizer said, “You’re an artist – you paint wine – you live in the Okanagan – that makes you an Okanagan Wine Art expert. So start an Okanagan Wine Art b**g – I mean commentary – and share your expertise. People will put on their sunglasses to bask in the radiance that is you!” Wow! With an expert like that in my corner, I’ll soon need a pedestal.

So I’ll address the issues art lovers might be conflicted about it. Maybe you don’t know how much you should pay for a picture. I’ll talk about that. Perhaps your “walls are full.” Mine are full too, but you’ll be amazed at the solutions Dolly has devised, and you’ll want to follow suit. I’m writing and illustrating a kid’s book that is so much fun a dead guy smiled when I showed it to him at his funeral. You’ll hear more about it here. The book, not the funeral. There is an endless array of art subjects we can discuss, and I will try to avoid revealing my ignorance about any of them. And I promise I won’t tear my sleeves off.

Are you worrying how often I’ll send you stuff? NOT once an hour. NOT once a day. NOT once a week. Maybe, once a month. Because honestly, if I’m going to be an Okanagan Wine Art expert, I need time to paint and sip some of these magnificent Okanagan vintages.

So I hope you stick with me, because it’s going to be fun. Look for me in your inbox, or at OkanaganWineArt.ca

If you think your friends would also like to put their melancholy at risk, please forward this note, or share on your social media.

 

Thanks for joining!

Will Enns

See Will’s new Web Store, where you can order reproductions of his work on Canvas.

8 Comments

  1. Well, this is an interesting new direction. Love it. My melancholy is in your hands. Go Will!

    • Will Enns Will Enns

      Laurie, it’s a way to release the inner scribe. It also helps let the voices out. Thanks!

  2. Steph Steph

    Good Lord my sides ache from laughing! Love your ‘commentary’. I’d love to read more!

    • Will Enns Will Enns

      Steph,
      If you subscribed, you’ll get the chance. I can’t guaranty the laughs, because I frequently press the “cry” button by mistake. Those are the only two buttons I have because I can’t afford a “buy” button yet. Hope you stick around.

      • Anonymous Anonymous

        I’ve subscribed!

  3. Anonymous Anonymous

    Poor Dolly is always the spur that gets you moving!!! Dolly sounds like an amazing woman, and I look forward to hearing more about the innovative ways she uses to keep this artist on his toes!!
    Love, Dolly!!

    • Will Enns Will Enns

      Dear Dolly,
      Indeed, you are amazing, and anyone who has met you knows I didn’t make THAT up!

  4. Shawnne Di Pasquale Shawnne Di Pasquale

    I am so pleased to be the very fortunate person to win the draw for your 2 Glasses of Red, Will, from Artwork last weekend in Lake Country! I love it! It was so nice meeting you and Jennifer today. I look forward to meeting you again!

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